Is Your Ego Managing You or Are You Managing Your Ego?
We are A-Z thinkers, constantly worried about A, obsessing over Z, yet forgetting B through Y. Take responsibility and ownership for your actions, including your ego.
The first section is from Jacko Podcast, Episode 22: 1:46:26. It’s worth listening to. When it comes to the ego, this man puts things crystal clear.
In life, sometimes we may be tempted to look at things like the Greek story of Sisyphus pushing a rock up a hill just to watch it fall back down again. We struggle, we push, we watch it fall, and we drive ourselves literally to the definition of insanity by doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
Alas, what is the goal? Is the goal the top? That’s impossible, perfection is impossible. So why push the rock. Because that rock pushes back. That rock CHALLENGES us in a personal way that no one but us can understand its personal meaning. That rock is our WHY. That rock is all there is. That rock is a metaphor for life, our dreams, our goals… It’s an analogy for everything YOU do…and how you do anything is how you do everything.
The endless cycle of day-to-day challenges need to INSPIRE you. You need to look forward to the grind, every single day. For the grind is HOW we sharpen our abilities whether mentally or/and physically.
It’s not about winning. That’s ego. Winning shouldn’t matter in the moment. It’s the battle itself, the struggle, the daily test we have the opportunity to accept or decline every single day. Not just physically but mentally.
Getting that rock up to the top of the mountain. That is not what MY goal is. My goal ACTUALLY is pushing that rock because pushing that rock pushes ME. That makes me tougher, that makes me harder mentally and physically. It gives me much more than I give it.
You must want to struggle. You must have the burning desire, not itching, but burning desire to grind, claw, scratch, dig in and give it everything you have DAY IN AND DAY OUT. And you must actually and unconditionally want to PUSH.
You gotta want for it to never end. If you got the rock up that mountain and it stayed there would you push it back down yourself? Would you rather rest, or coast, or reach a point in your life where you say, “that’s it…I’ve done enough…I’m not going to give it any more…I’m not going to push anymore. I don’t need to workout today. I don’t need to care about technique today. I don’t need to watch myself today. I deserve…”
No. N-O. That relentless cycle of day-to-day challenges…they aren’t maddening. They shouldn’t frustrate you. They should inspire you to drive and push more and push harder. That’s what that rock does to you…The choice is yours.
So I say, dig in and get to pushing.
Jacko will fire you up. That’s from a question about ego. Let’s discuss it.
Our ego is our sense of self-esteem or self-importance. It’s the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and the unconscious and is responsible for reality testing and a sense of personal identity.
In a word, our ego is and has always been with us since the beginning. Only our brains were still getting developed. Unfortunately, our ego gets a bad wrap; however, we should embrace WHO WE ARE, our uniqueness, our strengths, our weaknesses and understand our ego.
What is the ego? We know it as ‘I’. It is just like our shadow. Always there…not always in front of us…but always there.
When our perspective becomes “I, I, I” we become very protective of how we perceive ourselves. Perception is the first section of one of my favorite practical books called ‘The Obstacle is the Way‘. Here’s my opening notes on perception:
- How we see/understand what occurs around us and what we decide those events will mean.
- We must learn how to limit/filter our passions and their control over our lives.
- Learn to see things simply and straightforwardly, as they truly are.
- This is an incredible advantage in the fight against obstacles.
The irony? YOU are YOUR greatest obstacle! Let’s discuss the misunderstood ego…
We Decide What Events Will Mean
Who is the most powerful person in your world? YOU. In a wonderful book called ‘The War of Art‘ ego’s negativity is dubbed ‘Resistance’. It resembles everything ‘negative’ about the ego…but guess what? You are in control…did you know that? You are in the driver’s seat of you. What is in our control?
- Our Emotions
- Our Judgments
- Our Creativity
- Our Attitude
- Our Perspective
- Our Desires
- Our Decisions
- Our Determination
- Our Discipline
What is NOT up to us? Everything else. Everything outside you is external and is out of your control. Period. Think about it…So is ego truly the enemy or is our lack of management of it the problem? After all, who is the CEO of YOU, inc.? It’s your choice to manage your ego and it is a choice for us to allow our ego to have a vote. Only YOUR vote matters. And you make the rules of You, Inc. You are a very powerful and capable human being my friend…
But they’re always there…the trifecta. The ‘good guy’ the ‘bad guy’ and us in the middle. What are we to do?
We Must Learn How to Limit/Filter Our Passions and Their Control Over Our Lives
Keep your plans adaptable so you can make adjustments when you need to. Starting with the end in mind certainly helps us think long-term. The ego is more about right here, right now? Why? Our ego doesn’t recognize time…only we do…it’s externally man made. Think about it…time is one of our greatest assets and tools available. Thanks moon!
Life, as you, dear reader is all too well aware, is full of surprises. This important thing if you keep moving in a positive direction for YOU. Not anyone else but YOU. Society wants You, Inc. to work for Society, Inc. So whose goals are important to Society? Think about it, take a second…really think about that. What does big Society want – Perfection and production. Is perfection possible? Let’s define it.
Perfection is the condition, state, or quality of being free or as free as possible from all flaws or defects. Well, guess what? We’re human. None of us are capable of perfection. Not a single one of us. But what does this illusion of perfection cause? Pessimism.
Pessimism is a tendency to see the worst aspect of things or believe that the worst will happen; a lack of hope or confidence in the future. That definition is terrible. Let’s redefine it as pessimism is viewing things in the negative regardless of our performance:
- I’ll never…
- I don’t….
- I can’t…
- I suck…
- Maybe tomorrow…
- It won’t happen…
- I’m not…
- Comparing yourself to….whatever
It is the slipperiest of slopes leading to viewing the world and ourselves as nothing but hopelessness. Self-learned and endorsed hopelessness. And nothing could be further from the truth! Don’t give negativity a vote.
In ‘Thinking Fast and Slow‘ the author says the biggest gift you can encourage on others, especially your children, is the gift of Optimism. Here’s an example:
Ego / Pessimism: “I’m top of the food chain”. Everything is me, me, me.
Eco / Optimism: “Dude, if we tasted like bacon we’d be screwed.” Everything is we, we, we.
Learn To See Things Simply and Straightforwardly, As They Truly Are
In life, it doesn’t matter what happens to you or where you came from. It matters what you do with what happens and what you’ve been given.
Arm thyself with knowledge:
- Be open-minded
- QUESTION (literally use google and cross-examine sources)
- Don’t listen too closely to what others say (including me)
- Do your due diligence (YOUR own)
- Learn to manage YOU, Inc.
- Personal Development
- Impact on the World
- Try not to take ANYTHING too seriously (especially yourself)
This is an Incredible Advantage in the Fight Against Obstacles
In life, it doesn’t matter what happens to you or where you came from. It matters what you do with what happens and what you’ve been given. In obstacles of the ego, action is the only thing these situations will respond to. Each obstacle we overcome makes us stronger for the next one.
No excuses. No exceptions. No way around it.
It’s 100% on YOU. Take ownership of your You, Inc. Declare Marshal Law on yourself…things get easier when you stop allowing no one but you to have a vote in You, Inc. and take responsibility. No one gets a vote with you and your ego unless you allow them to.
Negativity? No vote.
Pessimism? No vote.
Fear? No vote.
Excuses? No vote.
Procrastination? No vote.
Personally, I use negativity as my ‘red flag’. You can too. Internally I will accept no compromise with internal negativity. Others? Of course! Compromises is what’s life is all about. But when it comes to Jamo, Inc. there can be no compromises. There must be discipline or internal chaos. There is no in-between. We’re going towards our dreams up the mountain or hanging out with the masses complaining about our rocks.
We can always and only greet our obstacles:
- With Energy
- With Persistence
- With a Logical and Deliberate Process
- With Resilience
- With Pragmatism
- With Strategic Long-term Vision
- With Craftiness and Savvy
- And an Eye for Opportunity and Pivotal Moments
Thanks for reading. Get after it. It’s never to late to get back to the fray within. See you on the mountain. Look for emojis ;).
Here’s what I would write, it’s from Thinking Fast and Slow. That book taught me to be very careful when it comes to our mind…and that means the ego too:
“Good practices will be rewarded by good results. Understanding is an illusion.”
The choice is always yours. Whenever and wherever your ready…the choice is yours and yours alone.
Website’s for self-help:
Warning: Jacko keeps it real. Like no BS the world can be dark real. If you want the self-help stuff just skip to the questions. The books are deep. Just a heads up.